ACTUAL transcript of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995. This radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval Operations on 10-10-95.

Americans: “Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.”
Canadians: “Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.”
Americans: “This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.”
Canadians: “No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.”
Americans: “THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS ABRAHAM LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES’ ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH. THAT’S ONE-FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.”
Canadians: “This is a lighthouse. Your call.”
 
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/the-obstinate-lighthouse/
​

 
A guy opened the barber's door and asked the barber how long he has to wait for a hair cut. Being a busy day, the hairdresser looked around and responded: "About two hours." The guy left in a hurry.

Few days later the same guy entered the barber shop and asked again how long he has to wait for a hair cut. Being a crowded day again, the barber looked around and answered: "About three hours." And again, the guy left in a hurry and did not come back.

Few days later the same story repeats.

The barber, already curious, asked his disciple Ben:
“Ben, follow the guy and see what on earth is he doing.”
Ben obeyed and run after the guy. He was back in twenty minutes.

“Well,” said the barber, “where did this guy go after he left?”
​
Ben, all smiles, replied: “At your house.”